The miles keep adding up and before I know it, I am at the other end of the park, along the great highway, and looking out at the great and mighty Pacific Ocean. I can barely see it because of the fog, but i can still hear the waves and feel the energy. DAMN, I LOVE THIS PLACE. The smells of Eucalyptus all throughout the park and the cool temperatures washing over my skin. So refreshing. So needed. And then, I think of mom. My Mom. Who loved the city. This City. This City where I was born. San Francisco. This place she held so dearly. And in these moments when my feet are traveling, when my body is running through Golden Gate Park, I am giving her my love and my silent Thank you for being with me as long as you could…as long as the world and God and all the rest would have it. Thank you for bringing me into this world, caring for me and loving me. Mom. May your star continue to shine. Bright.

I keep running and make my way up the small incline of the next 2+ miles. Passing by Stow Lake, traffic of both cars and people have increased. I’m nearing 7 miles now and i see my car up ahead. Perfect time to stop as I am tired. My legs, my quads are tired….But, I can’t. Push on for 8. I run right pass my card and onto the GG Panhandle and make it one more mile, as planned. Not easy. But, I made it. Stuck to my commitment. I was a happy gal!!

ONWARD!!

Also, hoping to run a half marathon in June. Haven’t signed up just yet….

Run Happy. Run Strong.

My work, in general, is dominated by males and by nature, is a very “aggressive” or “masculine” occupation. What do i mean by this: the occupation is very outward, high energy, with much focus on goals, accomplishments, etc…It’s nature is Outward. It’s the Yang (yin/yang) I enjoy my work and am pretty damn passionate about it. If you hear me talk about it, you will probably get that about me….at any time, it can be complicated, every changing, dynamic, challenging, maddening, enthralling, and very gratifying. It is not simple, easy, comfortable or boring. Thank Goodness!

My whole week was spent planning, strategizing, evaluating, reviewing, etc…all about the future and creating what I want and creating a plan to execute. And I loved it. It was mentally tiring and physically draining, but it was full of valuable nuggets for me to implement. It was a week long cram session.

Friday, I flew home to SF from NY and if you travel that route, you know it is a looong flight. Around 6 hours. + the travel to the airport in the morning and the travel home from SFO. Add on another 8.5 hours of sitting. ARRGGHHHH!!!!!! After a week of lots of sitting and little time for exercise. ARRRGGHHHH…..My body was dying for movement.

So, I arrive home about 9pm on Friday night and by 9am on Saturday morning, I was at a DAY LONG MEDITATION RETREAT CENTER. This was already planned into my schedule and when I realized it was the day after my trip to NY, it’s not like I was too excited for it since it involved more sitting!!

However….as the Gods would have it, it ended up being timed PERFECTLY. As I arrived at the beautiful center and settled in for our 1st of many meditations, I was quite thankful for this day and this opportunity. And I was enormously struck by the complete and utter contrast to the environment I just left….

This day was going to be 8 hours of SILENT MEDITATION. Surrounded in an environment that was gorgeous, restorative and nurturing. This was the feminine, the YIN, the INNER.

I was struck by these 2 opposite places and events and how I involve myself in both. I am passionate about my work and I am passionate about caring for my soul, my spirit. The 2 are not dis-connected. I weave them together. I can hold both.

“Sit. Feast on your life” – Derek Walcott

-Ryan Adams

There’s a small crowd gathering here in one of the open spaces of San Pedro Valley Park in Pacifica. I look around and start taking notice; trail runners. trail race. Such a different vibe here than a road race. Less people. Feels a lot more casual. I’ve always loved this vibe and happy to experience it again. In line for the bathroom, I listen to the chatter of those around me…talking about the cold, the course…all I know is it looked about 3 miles or so uphill and then about the same back down. Let’s get to it. 

Our 10k race began 10 minutes after the 50km, marathon and half marathon. I was a little bummed i had not entered the half distance, but felt the 10k was more appropriate for today. It would have about 1200 feet of elevation and that quite manageable. The small lot of us began our journey….a gradual then steeper ascents up and up and turn and turn on multliple single track switchbacks. my heart was beating. a great thing. no music on my ears today…just the sound of my own breathing (which got heavier and louder as the steps ensued) and the sounds of my fellow runners ahead and behind me. Most of the trail was in the open, not shaded. A gorgeous day. One short downhill and then up and up again. we finally reached the top and I looked and saw the Pacific Ocean over yonder. A beauty. Keep going. Finally on the descent; time to fly. My small body quickly making it’s way down and down more switchbacks. Not very rooted, pretty smooth trail. Gaining speed and hoping to pick up ground on anyone who might be in front of me. but, i see no one. they must be flying too. I’m going fast. I like this…this semi out of control feeling…but I feel good. i feel confident in my steps and stride. I am not holding back. Keep going. Finally, we are in the last mile and I pass not 1, but 2 women and 1 fella passes me. He was really flyin’! I rushed passed the ladies and then found myself going full steam into a section that was basically a eucalyptus grove. towering trees. wonderful. peaceful. i kept plugging along and all of a sudden with about .5 miles to go, i hear footsteps behind me and kept a panic surge. i don’t want anyone to pass me. legs were really feeling it now after the 3 miles of flying downhill….ahhhh…keep going…..

i did. i stayed ahead.

i finished my first race of 2013. Came in 2nd in my age group women 40-49. pretty cool.

awesome day. can’t wait to do it again. 

Shoes worn: Brooks Pure Flow. worked great on these soft packed dirt trails.

I felt myself excited and awakened by the new sights all around me. My senses were awakened. On alert. I wanted to take it all in. I love how a new place has this effect. I had been to Santa Cruz many times in the past….but i’m talking about 25 years ago….

After run, made my way back downtown to visit Verve and find dinner. If you don’t know, I’m a big coffee fan and love finding new good coffee and coffee shops. Verve did not disappoint! I went to 1 of their 3 Santa Cruz locations. Its located downtown on the main street, Pacific. The shop was spacious, tall ceilings and a large area for the baristas to do their thing! A decent sized crowd were sitting and doing THEIR thing. I ordered a Cappuccino and passed on the yummy looking Chocolate Chip Cookie. While my drink was bring crafted, I nosed around in the shop…looking at their beans, mugs, apparel (yes!) and other logo items. I knew i would spend more than a few bucks in this place! I picked up my splendid cappuccino and took a seat at the bar area that allowed me to watch the baristas. Love that! The VIBE in this place was a huge plus. Young, cute,  friendly staff. All of them. Welcoming!  

I also ended up chatting w/ a gal who works there and she gave me a recommendation for dinner. I asked for “someplace casual with a TV to watch sports”. She directed me to SurfRider Cafe about 1/2 mile away. It was pretty packed but I got a seat at the bar immediately. Ordered a house-made Veggie burger w/ sweet potato fries and an ale called Dragon’s Breath. All very good! And again, loved the vibe in THIS place. Young, casual crowd. Very good and pleasant service. I think the VIBE i am speaking about is just very much Santa Cruz. Always been a very casual, independent, liberal place. Love that!

Saturday morning got up and went back to Verve for morning coffee. using my iPad, i found one of their other locations about 2 miles away and figured that would be a fun out and back route. So, off i went. There’s a river that runs thru town, The San Lorenzo River, and the route carried me on a path next to the river. Mostly flat, with just a little bit of incline. Gorgeous day outside. I could see the Boardwalk Rides off in the distance. And the Pacific Ocean. AHHHHH — Soon enough the short 3.6 mile run was over and again, i felt like i couldn’t run much more. for now!!

Got breakfast, walked around a bit, got cleaned up and headed to the Boardwalk. I went straight to the arcade and played my old favorite video games; Ms Pac Man & Centipede. Fun! I could’ve played longer, but had only a short time to get a few rides in and head back home. I chose 2 rides; Double Shot – which is just a straight ride up 125 ft. Super fast up and super fast down. a few times. I was facing the ocean and of course, great views. I was screaming and laughing the entire time. Other ride was the classic Giant Dipper roller coaster. More laughing the entire time. I love rides…i love the feeling of being locked in but totally out of control. SOOOO FUN. I really needed it.

This morning (Sunday) I drove just a short distance over to Mill Valley to hit some trails I had yet visited. These were right off of Tennessee Valley Road. I really had no idea where I was going, but i thought it would be easy to get back to the starting point, and it was. I ran, hiked up and came to some amazing views of the bay! Picture does not justice. 

The trail up was mostly single track with hard packed dirt. I could’ve worn regular road shoes but I had my adidas trail shoes on. Came to some fire roads also. A hefty climb, especially given my current level of fitness..but i sure loved being out there!

So…I am making progress with getting back to being as fit as i want to be. Here’s a snapshot of what i’ve done lately.

Feb 10: 6 mile trail run; Elevation gain 1,179 (highest elevation gain since last August!)

Feb 9: 3.6 mile road run

Feb 8: 3 mile road run

Feb 7: core workout @ home

Feb 5:  3 mile treadmill run

Feb 2: 4.25 mile trail run; Elevation gain 635 (makes me realize how this is really nothing compared to what i can do in muir woods)

Feb 1: 3 mile road run

So as you can see, February is off to a much better start than January. Thank God for HEALTH! I still have not picked any races. Basically, I’m just trying to get a base level of fitness back and go from there. I saw a lot of folks on the trails today and that also gave me a boost!

Also, these are the newest add to my collection:

Brooks Pure Connect. These are one of the minimalist shoes. Not the least MINIMAL, but mid range minimal. So far, so good. I like the feel..like they hug your feet. Good traction even on the trail I used them for last weekend. Got ‘em at a new specialty running store: San Francisco Running Company located in Mill Valley. If you are in the area, go pay them a visit. Good guys running the show!

So. 2013 has not started exactly the way I had hoped…on December 26th, I got sick with the flu. It lasted for about 2 weeks and since then, I have been experiencing much achiness and fatigue. I feel like the damn thing just flattened me. And it did. I haven’t missed any work, but left early many days. My weekends, up until this current weekend, have basically been spent on the couch/bed. Not feeling the physical energy to do much for such a long time now has been quite the challenge.

I love being active. Of course, I love to run. But, I also love just having the energy to go about my day with some zest! During the past month, i have felt depressed, angry, agitated, cranky, irritable. I have done my best every day to be patient with my body as it clearly has a course of its own to run. I went to the doctor, had some blood work done just to be thorough….all came back normal. More patience with just what is….

I have not experienced this kind of sickness since about late 1990′s, so it’s been even the more challenging. I have been running about 3-5 days a week for about 15 years, so to have such a lengthly delay has been bubble bursting in so many ways. Some people will understand it and others won’t. And, that’s ok. Running makes me feel alive in a way that nothing else does. If you have read my blog for a while, you probably get it.

And…I’m trying to see the positives in all this. My flaw has been I do not give myself enough time to rest after big races and I had 2 big races last year. I know I am guilty of not enough rest. And part of me sees this delay as learning a lesson in this regard. I’m absorbing the lesson. Sometimes, after a big race, I’m so excited i just can’t wait to keep going for the next thing. But, there’s another lesson here too: to truly embrace my current self-accomplishment. Too often these past few years, I have not allowed myself to just “enjoy the after…” And, I think that is part of the nature of the mentality of runners…to keep re-setting their goals. Believe me, I am all for goal-setting, but i am getting the other lessons here too.

So, where am I now? Well, after a full month of little to no physical exercise. I am basically starting from zero. For example, I ran for 10 minutes on Friday and walked for 5 minutes.

Yesterday, I ran 2 miles and walked 5 minutes.

Hard to understand I ran a marathon in October. I could not run 5 miles right now. And….that is ok. I will get back. Smartly.

I remain positive and upbeat and ever determined.

Onward.