Dreaming

When I was 11 years old, I participated in a city-wide track meet. I competed in the 100 yard dash. “Tryouts” were held at our school to determine which kids would represent our school. I made it. I cannot explain how excited and proud I was. Chariots of Fire had already been out at the movies and i had gone to see it. Even though much of it was beyond me as an 11 year old, I got the parts that mattered to me the most: determination of spirit. Even at such a young age, I was enveloped with a seriousness and determination for doing my very best and with a competitive juice that has lasted still. Before the track meet, my mom had gone out and bought the 45 version of Chariots of Fire theme song.  Before leaving for the meet, we(my family) listened to it as we ran around our living room in slow motion. It sounds kinda goofy, but it was one of the most memorable moments with my mom.

The track meet was held in the early evening and my mom and siblings were in the stands. The track surface was very loose dirt and i can hear the sounds now…those little crunches under my feet. I was so nervous and excited. There were so many people in the stands and I wanted to make mom proud. Soon enough, my start time was up. The gun went off and off i went ablaze down the track. Two of my very good friends were in the race too and I was out ahead. I was so far ahead that I had a chance to look back and see them. A little part of me felt bad & guilty for beating my friends, but i was so happy for my accomplishment. I was so happy and proud that I thought my little heart would burst. My accomplishment felt so BIG. It was, at that time.

In my youth, I had dreams of being an Olympian. I had dreams of being a sprinter and then it changed to dreams of being a distance runner…a la Mary Decker (but, not falling). What was great was that my mom never tried to squash my dreams. She never thought I should aim lower. She always told me she believed I could do whatever I put my mind and heart into. We all need that, don’t we? Someone to believe in us. …

Well…I will never be an Olympian. But, that is ok. Because I can still dream and I can still feel like one. I can still go out and give all i have and do my very best.

And I still hear the Chariots of Fire theme song in my head….