blood, bonds and costumes

family. tribe. whether we want to or not, we are all members of a family, a tribe. we may be connected by blood, by common interests, by our work or other means. when a tribe comes together and stays together for any significant period of time, bonds are formed. through the good, bad and ugly, bonds are formed. we develop our routines, our patterns and we develop our expectations within the tribe. as the days pass and we come and go, we get ourselves in a groove and we become familiar with what is. we come to rely on those tribal mates for our everyday survival…whether that be to see their face everyday, hear their voice or joke around with them. throughout the every day mundane that is undoubtedly a part of any tribal community, we build bridges, we cross over rivers to meet each other, we cheer for each other, we care when things go wrong, we laugh together and we commiserate together. history gets built over the years and thru the mundane of the life lived together. it’s not always exciting or fun or even noteworthy, but the history gets made and all of sudden, you wake up and realize you know so much about your tribal mates and they you.

and then. there is a yank of separation. a tribe mate voluntarily departs; calmly, yet violently…for how else can one describe the yank of separation from everything that is known, everything that is familiar. it is a brutal, violent and painful jolt from all current reality. a torturous yank of separation from the tribe who is all you know. the willing individual walks away from those that have helped shape, nurture and love them. And yet, it doesn’t feel so willing. it feels as if a huge beast flew into the nest and tore our tribe apart..The Big Beast flies away, carrying the member as they scream viciously in silence. Unable to be heard, unable to fight off the wicked beast.

And yet, don’t we all have to leave the tribe at some point in order to grow? Don’t we all have to peak our heads out and take a chance? or should always stay with that which is so comfortable, stable & familiar? How will we ever grow and be challenged if we stay with what is familiar and easy and comfortable?

Wearing a willing suit, I walked away. I was heavily disguised.

Six months later and the suit, the costume, has been torn, ripped to shreds.

Happy Halloween.

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