Miles and a few Acre’s

Last weekend, I was able to spend a long weekend in the SF Bay Area. If you have followed any of my recent posts, then you will understand when i say it was a much needed break and get-a-way. While on the trip, I was able to run 3 days in a row, which was awesome. No run was over 5 miles, but all were good quality and fun.

Saturday morning, I dragged Alec out. I stayed at his place in SF, and after morning coffee, we went and parked near Kezar Stadium/Golden Gate Park. I wanted to run in the park and end the run in the stadium. We got out of car and went on our separate ways. Alec said he would just walk since he had not run since the 10k in Half Moon Bay on 9/25. I went on my way through GG park. It was a beautiful morning and lots of runners were out taking advantage of such a gorgeous place. I miss running there…such a gorgeous oasis. After 3.25 miles, I was back at Kezar. Another one of my favorite places to run. An open stadium that always inspires and challenges me. Pushes me harder. I decided to run 10 minutes of all stairs. Ran one side of the stadium and then the other side. Then, back to the 1st side one more time. Legs were pushed! Heart was beating fast. Loved it! THAT is my juice. Absolutely.
Oh, before I started at the stadium, I saw Alec. He was running. Yep. Mr. “i’ll just walk” was running and he seemed to be having a good time. yep. Mr. “why do we have to go” was having fun! Alec snapped these pictures. A great start to our Saturday.

Sunday morning, we were in Petaluma. I snuck out early for a run with a friend over at Shollenberger Park. It’s an awesome 2 mile flat loop around a marsh. Such a quiet, beautiful morning. I was a little hesitant to meet there…thinking maybe I wanted to just run through the quiet, quaint streets of Petaluma, but it ended up being perfect. We ran mostly together for the first loop. I hadn’t run with anyone in a long time and it was fun. Fun to talk and then just be quiet and only hear our feet as they made crunchy sounds on the path below us and our steady breathing as runners doing our thing. Awesome. I went for a second loop alone and enjoyed that as well. We sat for a few minutes afterwards and just watched the nature around us. I needed to just sit for a few. To be reminded of the simple. the steady. the things in nature that JUST ARE. There is no judgement, no stress. Just existence. Simply beautiful. We even saw a hawk.
I was able to go for one more run Monday afternoon. I ran from Holly’s place and took a round about way into downtown Petaluma. I do love running there. Streets are so quiet, pretty, not much traffic. Had a little bit of downhill to start and so i knew i’d have some uphill on way back. By the time this run came around, my body was tired. Had gotten little sleep on trip and had drank some. Not much, but back to back nights of drinking + no sleep = tired body. I thought of ending the run at the BOTTOM of the .5 mile hill back up to Holly’s house. Then, I thought of how absolutely wimpy that would be, so I put my head down and pumped the legs and my arms. The first 3/4 of the hill is a good gradual uphill that keep increasing in steepness. Then, there’s a turn and the last 1/4 of the hill is just brutal. Nothing but a lung bursting, quad busting, heart burning kind of hill. An awesome way to finish.

In between great visits with friends, I took a stroll along one of my old favorite neighborhoods in Santa Rosa. I wanted to see if the Gingko leaves had fallen yet. Most of the trees were still full. I was slightly bummed.

Not nearly enough leaves for me to shuffle through…..

I also had some coffee while I was away. And, I hate to admit it, but I cheated on Peet’s more than once. I did have Peet’s in SF, but when we went to Petaluma, I ventured out. I have a few reasons for this; the Peet’s in Petaluma is probably one of the ONLY locations I do not like. The place does not have good energy and it is not comfortable to sit there. A big bummer! Also, i had heard about a new coffee place right in downtown called Acre. So, of course, i had to go and see what the hoopla was about and see if it met my particular standards. HA.

So. What was the verdict of Acre? Loved it. It has light wood colors inside and feels soft. The music playing all 3 times I was there was on the quieter side. They have ample seating, even one long “family style” table. Each individual table has a little lamp. Get this? There is a typewriter. Yes, an honest to god old typewriter that anyone can use. Pretty cool. I even used it. So, I give it an A on the Atmosphere.
The coffee? My first taste was a purchased for me small cappuccino. It was the perfect size and very good. Not too much milk, which is as it should be. My second taste was regular coffee. It was good, not as strong as I usually prefer, but still a good cup of java.
I went back on another day for another cappuccino because I wanted it in a “for here” mug. For some reason, it was not as good as the day before, so that was kinda disappointing. Maybe it was me and my taste buds or maybe some inconsistency. Guess I will just have to keep going back.

Today, I ran for 1st time in 6 days. Hadn’t run since last Monday due to the traveling back to ATL, catching up, and then feeling sick since Friday morning. Ran 4 miles today even though still a lil sick. But, what is it that they say?
Oh yeah, “in sickness and in health”

Keep Movin’

lately

Been forced to do quite a bit of thinking and evaluating lately about ATTACHMENT and AUTONOMY and CONTROL. Well…i feel like these thoughts have been all consuming for a while, but even more intensely the last 3 weeks or so.

ATTACHMENT (defined): a feeling that binds one to a person, thing, cause, ideal or the like.

Why do we get so attached to things or ideas or causes? Why does it feel so torturous when the “string” is cut, so to speak? Sure, it’s super easy to just keep thinking, “just let go, just let go”, but when you feel like the thing or ideal is as much a part of you as your arm or leg, it’s hard to “let go.”
When the “string is cut”, it DOES feel like the rug has been pulled out from underneath and of course, all hell breaks loose inside. No one likes that feeling. Of course, Pema Chodron, the great buddhist nun author has a field day with the whole rug thing:
“Everything is changing all the time and we keep wanting to pin it down. to fix it. So whenever you come up with a solid conclusion, let the rug be pulled out. You can pull out your own rug and you can also let life pull it out for you. Having the rug pulled out from under you is a big opportunity to change your DNA. One way to pull out your own rug is by letting go, lightening up, being more gentle and not making such a big deal.”

Whew. Gosh, why does it sound so easy?

And then there’s this whole thing about Autonomy!
Autonomy (defined): Independence or Freedom

Well, that’s been me in a nutshell. If you ask anyone in my life to describe me, INDEPENDENT, is most likely a word that would come up. I didn’t just get that way last year or 5 years ago. I have been that way my ENTIRE life. First by circumstances and then buy choice.

If you see a wild and free animal out and about doing their thing and then all of a sudden, they become captured and are forced to live in a cage, you can probably guess that said animal is not happy. Might become angry, might “fight” against and with their captors. And then who knows, all hell might break loose. Makes perfect sense. For the first time, I finally get what all the hoopla is about regarding endangered species. I do. I understand. More than I want to.

And then there is this thing about CONTROL! So, I guess I have discovered how much of a control freak I can be. Let me just say I have NEVER EVER described myself as such in the past. But, the events of the past month or so have shined the light so ever brightly on this oh-so-endearing characteristic that I was nearly blinded. In fact, I may have been blinded for a few hours due to the stinging “headlight” in my face. As I think about autonomy and control, i can’t help but wonder if the two go hand in hand. Are independent people more controlling than others? Hmmm…

So, Controlling+Autonomy+Attachment is what I am wrestling with. The bight lights, the full length mirror are in my face, following me around. I need to be the humble student, but it’s not easy.

You know…I’ve actually prided myself all along on being very good with attachment stuff…HA. Who knew that my work was not attachment to a person but to a thing, a process, an ideal…

(THUMP) Did you hear that? That was my ass hitting the ground as the rug just got pulled out from under me.