Archive for December, 2012

who are we?

Posted in random, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on December 28, 2012 by afuntanilla

I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the violence we see in this country. I think about this a lot. I notice so much of the violence comes from the male population and it makes me even more curious as to why this is the case. When have we heard of a female shooting up a cinema, school, church, etc?? I don’t think I have heard of any. This is NOT to bash the males of society, but clearly there is something very wrong with the way our culture is operating. On Christmas Day, I heard an opinion of an active police officer who took issue with the media. His comments were that the media blows the stories up and gives the stories/issues way too much attention. And then he linked it to kids wanting attention. They watch someone on TV getting all that attention and think, “hey, i can do that too!” I think there is some validity to all his comments, but its deeper than that. What is it in males that make them want to hurt, KILL…take a life? Is it easy because they place no value on life. Where does that come from? The understanding of the value of LIFE. Clearly, anyone who kills themselves in the process of killing others has no value for their own life. Fine, but why is it necessary to eliminate others? Maybe because we live in a society that wants to blame everyone else. Think about it for yourself. Be Honest. Who do you blame? Why? Think of the people in your life. Who do they blame? Look at the government. There is a true and tremendous lack of accountability and self-responsibility in our culture.

I remember as a kid I wasn’t afraid of guns…probably because they weren’t really a part of everyday life as they seem to be now. I walked to school almost every day by myself. I walked home everyday. You know what I was worried about….i was scared the cats on a particular street would all attack me at the same time. Seriously! There was a ton of cats on this street and they all looked very spooky with wicked eyes and they scared me. I started to walk down a different street.

I was also scared someone might kidnap me. Kidnapping seemed to be more in the news when I was a kid.

Is it really about guns? I don’t know. I think it’s about more than the guns. We have big problems with how we think and behave as a society. Parents need to be better parents. And then at some point, we all have to get responsible. And yes, part of this i think has to do with people feeling loved and being nutured. When was the last time you heard of someone committing a mass murder who was a loved kid, had a stable and healthy home life? These are not the people committing the crimes.

I come from a family where this male-as-criminal phenomenon is crystal clear.

In my immediate family and my extended family on one side there were 9 boys i grew up with and all of them got into trouble with the law and used drugs. None of them graduated from high school or college. All were having problems and/or arrested by the time they were at least 15 years old. Some of them remain in prison and/or continue to live on the streets, addicted to drugs. All were members of a gang at some point. The main commonality between all of these boys: no father figure whatsoever. No stable home life.

It’s not rocket science, but it’s not just about the guns, either. As a society, what are we committed to? It sure doesn’t help that our society looks completely down on those who have mental illness, even depression. There are such gigantic stigmas with mental illness that people who need help, even in low doses, probably don’t even attempt to do so. Or the parents don’t get help for their kid. Or the places they try to go to for help are such poorly run institutions, they opt out. More money from our government needs to be allocated to help those with mental illness. PERIOD.

p.s. for the record, I am NOT pro-guns.

Winding down…

Posted in races, random, running, trail with tags , , , , on December 24, 2012 by afuntanilla


I’ve scaled back on the running these past couple of months. After running my last race, the SF Nike Women’s Marathon in October, I thought it was best to simply rest a little. In November, I only ran a total of 52 miles and so far in December, I’ve only run about 40 miles. I noticed in November that my head and heart just were not fully¬†into¬†it. And my legs weren’t into it much either…so I kept scaling back. I am pretty tuned into my body and so…

So far in December, I’ve enjoyed the miles. I’ve run 2 times on the trails at Helen Putnam Park in Petaluma. The trails are hilly for this area, but it terms of elevation, not a lot. For example, the last run I did there, the elevation gain was a bit less than 800 ft. I mention this because I am considering running a significant trail race in April and if i do, i will need to find steeper and bigger trails to train on. The high elevation for the race are is 5000 ft…so…i must find other trails if I decide to do this race. Still mulling it over…

Over the next few days, I hope to post my review of 2012 and then what i hope to accomplish in 2013.

Still planning and dreaming. BIG. Hope you are too.