who are we?

I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the violence we see in this country. I think about this a lot. I notice so much of the violence comes from the male population and it makes me even more curious as to why this is the case. When have we heard of a female shooting up a cinema, school, church, etc?? I don’t think I have heard of any. This is NOT to bash the males of society, but clearly there is something very wrong with the way our culture is operating. On Christmas Day, I heard an opinion of an active police officer who took issue with the media. His comments were that the media blows the stories up and gives the stories/issues way too much attention. And then he linked it to kids wanting attention. They watch someone on TV getting all that attention and think, “hey, i can do that too!” I think there is some validity to all his comments, but its deeper than that. What is it in males that make them want to hurt, KILL…take a life? Is it easy because they place no value on life. Where does that come from? The understanding of the value of LIFE. Clearly, anyone who kills themselves in the process of killing others has no value for their own life. Fine, but why is it necessary to eliminate others? Maybe because we live in a society that wants to blame everyone else. Think about it for yourself. Be Honest. Who do you blame? Why? Think of the people in your life. Who do they blame? Look at the government. There is a true and tremendous lack of accountability and self-responsibility in our culture.

I remember as a kid I wasn’t afraid of guns…probably because they weren’t really a part of everyday life as they seem to be now. I walked to school almost every day by myself. I walked home everyday. You know what I was worried about….i was scared the cats on a particular street would all attack me at the same time. Seriously! There was a ton of cats on this street and they all looked very spooky with wicked eyes and they scared me. I started to walk down a different street.

I was also scared someone might kidnap me. Kidnapping seemed to be more in the news when I was a kid.

Is it really about guns? I don’t know. I think it’s about more than the guns. We have big problems with how we think and behave as a society. Parents need to be better parents. And then at some point, we all have to get responsible. And yes, part of this i think has to do with people feeling loved and being nutured. When was the last time you heard of someone committing a mass murder who was a loved kid, had a stable and healthy home life? These are not the people committing the crimes.

I come from a family where this male-as-criminal phenomenon is crystal clear.

In my immediate family and my extended family on one side there were 9 boys i grew up with and all of them got into trouble with the law and used drugs. None of them graduated from high school or college. All were having problems and/or arrested by the time they were at least 15 years old. Some of them remain in prison and/or continue to live on the streets, addicted to drugs. All were members of a gang at some point. The main commonality between all of these boys: no father figure whatsoever. No stable home life.

It’s not rocket science, but it’s not just about the guns, either. As a society, what are we committed to? It sure doesn’t help that our society looks completely down on those who have mental illness, even depression. There are such gigantic stigmas with mental illness that people who need help, even in low doses, probably don’t even attempt to do so. Or the parents don’t get help for their kid. Or the places they try to go to for help are such poorly run institutions, they opt out. More money from our government needs to be allocated to help those with mental illness. PERIOD.

p.s. for the record, I am NOT pro-guns.

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2 Responses to “who are we?”

  1. it’s such a pity that we allow this kind of societal destruction and don’t take the concerted steps to help those most in need and deal with root problems. it wouldn’t take much resources or time.

  2. I read a really interesting article, I think it was in the NYTimes, that talked about this same male phenomenon, and examining that it might be a result of the feeling of “loss of power.” That seemed to make a lot of sense.

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